Set Fire to the Rain
“When laying with you, I could stay there, close my eyes. Feel you here, forever - you and me together, nothing is better. ‘Cause there’s a side to you that I never knew, never knew. All the things you’d say, they were never true, never true…”
Sometimes, I just need to know.
Is this worth it?
Is what I’m doing actually working towards some sort of goal?
I feel like a part of it (or all of it, maybe) has already died and I’m just trying to bring it back to life.
Maybe it’s finally time to call it quits.
It’s always better to end on a good note than on a bad, right?
I dunno, I guess…
My head hurts. I wish I could just run away and not have to deal with this - but clearly, if I don’t want to deal with it anymore I should just… not.
Maybe it has been broken and there was no fixing it. Maybe there’s no way to fully let go of the past. Maybe you have to move on - you can’t sit there and fix it, you just have to let it be.
Maybe there’s no changing that.
Maybe after so long, my heart has finally said, “You can’t ask more of me. I’ve given all I had until I could give no more and all you’re getting is what was left of the pieces. I’m sorry, but you had your chance… and you blew it. Sky high.”
Maybe I can forgive you but I just can’t let the past go.
It’s hard, so very hard, for me to be in the position where I’m finally getting everything I’ve ever hoped for and dreamed of… All of the hugs, the kisses, the declarations - everything, and yet… And now… I no longer feel the way I used to. It doesn’t bring me the satisfaction that it once did. And the past, the past is lurking around every corner, bringing to light all of the things I thought I had let go.
…
I just want to quit everything. School, friends, (work), relationships and pack my bags, move to London and start a new life.
